"I just can't do it all. I can't play with her enough. I sat down and read books today. We did play-doh. We got CFA kids meals. We did everything in between, and she still asked me why I didn't play with her today."
Enter mom guilt.
I wanted to crawl in a hole for a brief moment. I wanted to verify that I had played with her. I wanted to justify myself and all the many things that had to be done around the house. But God..
In the midst of my bemoaning how I needed to play with our daughter more, the Lord reminded me of something greater - something more important - a lesson that even I still struggle everyday to understand.
I WILL NEVER BE ENOUGH FOR MY CHILD. ONLY JESUS WILL.
Talk about a heavy-hitting lesson right at bedtime. Even if I gave my daughter everything she's ever asked for, it still would not be enough. If I played with her every minute of every day, it still would not be enough. I will never fill that void in her life. And the things I so desperately spend my time and money towards will never fill that void in my own life.
Only Jesus will.
While I sit here pondering the enormity of what that means for ourselves and our children, my immediate thoughts turn to this:
We are to see Jesus as enough.
We are to be satisfied in what He has given.
We are to be content, at ease, calm, peaceful .. again, satisfied.
We are to be thankful and joyful.
We are to acknowledge His greater gifts in what He has done for us on the cross.
In that, He will be enough.
Is this easy? No. I believe this is what all of life is. It is a Jesus told his disciples "to deny ourselves, take up our crosses, and follow Him (Luke 9:23)".
But is it good? Absolutely.
So, how do we teach our kids and lead them to know that He is enough? Just like we can't eat an entire elephant in one bite, we take one bite at a time. And we start small. This most nearly means creating a culture of gratitude and thankfulness in our home. Can we indulge? Yes, every so often. (We certainly do. I even overindulge, so we need to pull back on that.) But by guiding our children toward contentment, we are assisting them in being satisfied with all that is given. Their portion. Their lot. This is the hard stuff. But it's also the good stuff.
I must also say this -- We know and believe God is the giver of all good gifts. We hold in the balance spoiling our children whilst also showing them a glimpse of the Father's love for us when we give them good things.
I am thankful the Lord is using my children to sanctify me. These lessons come, and this mama's heart realizes she needs the same lesson. She needs to be taught. She needs a posture that yields to her Father and sees Him as enough. He is gracious. He is kind. He is enough.
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