This Life.

I love to read! I'll read a book assuming someone else might've read it -- maybe I put "feelers" out there to see if anyone knows what I'm talking about with such and such book, because I'm desperate to talk about or process it or enjoy said book with someone else. Any time I see someone asking for recommendation I open my long "Notes" section on my phone that has ever book I've read since January 2020 recorded, and I begin the beautiful process of putting my recs out there. I decided it might be best to just share here what I've been reading, so you can add it to your growing list too! Maybe? .. Here are the rules to my book reviews. 1) I don't have a set "type". Well, maybe I do.. but I don't stay in one place. You'll see I'm a little all over the place. 2) I want say too much because I don't like to give much away. 3) Leave your own recs in comments please!

This feels foreign and unfamiliar. What was once the premiere platform of social media, the blog has quickly faded into ancient history. In its stead are Reels and TikToks -- fast clips and bits of information that only require our attention span for seconds. Are we able to condition ourselves to sit and listen, sit and read for longer than that? I suppose we can. I need to try. And so, for me, this platform will open back up. It's been a love, hate .. or an effort that requires more time than I can give. Yet, it is therapeutic, cathartic? Yes, it is.

This school year I decided to try something different. I needed a Bible study. I needed something that would require of me to sit and digest the Word in a way that I can't very well do on my own. Well, I can. But maybe I just lack the discipline. Don't get me wrong. I enjoy reading my Bible, but low on the totem pole is me who journals about any specific thing I might be learning. Discipline. I sense a pattern. This semester we are taking a deeper look at several books of the Bible including Colossians. You may notice a theme of sorts over the next couple of entries. It's quite interesting to me about God uses a Bible study to get my attention about various life circumstances.

 I need to begin this post by saying this: I absolutely adore my girls. It is a true blessing from the Lord to be there mom and to be able to stay home with them. They are easy-going (for the most part). They love the sunshine as much as I do. They are typically down for just about anything. They love their people something fierce. They are mini-me to a "T".

But here we are.

This house is chaotic at times. Things are being thrown every which way by an adventurous, always-exploring one year old. The imagination of my 4 year old runs wild. She is me. She can talk to a wall. She can create a situation. She can imagine. While this makes me proud, I do not relish the same stories over and over and over and over and over again. Once or twice - they're pretty darn cute. But some days this little train derails.

 I don't know if it's just a season.

When I've faced a difficult time in my life, I would often say "it's just a season". While that is true on some level, I think I'm realizing as I get older that life is just hard. It's not just a season. It's life. 

As simple as that might sound, it has brought incredible freedom to my own life. I found myself always waiting with baited-breath, clinging to the hope of the "season" coming to an end. And yet, as soon as one little situation was cleared, another one would come our way. 

The Thankful Leper

Now on his way to Jerusalem, Jesus traveled along the border between Samaria and Galilee. As he was going into a village, ten men who had leprosy met him. They stood at a distance  and called out in a loud voice, 'Jesus, Master, have pity on us!' When he saw them, he said, 'Go, show yourselves to the priests.' And as they went, they were cleansed. One of them, when he saw he was healed, came back, praising God in a loud voice. He threw himself at Jesus' feet and thanked him -- and he was a Samaritan. Jesus asked, 'Were not all ten cleansed? Where are the other nine? Was no one found to return and give praise to God except this foreigner?' Then he said to him, 'Rise and go; your faith has made you well.'" (Luke 17:11-19, NIV)

I covet my time at the end of the day. You know what I'm talking about. The kids are in bed. The kids are asleep, or at least on their way to sleepy-town. But this night was different. Call it hormones or a teachable moment, but I was fully in it as I made my way to Jeremy's office.

 Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour. 1 Peter 5:8

Here I am three years into this thing. This thing -- parenthood. And while, I would consider myself one who has diligently prayed over and prayed with my child. I feel certain there is more I could do. Not one to condemn myself but solely landing on conviction here.

I would say the events of the last year or so have really opened my eyes beyond what I'm dealing with on a daily basis. No longer just occupied with the refilling of snacks and potty training, there's something larger going on in our world that will effect my girls, our girls for years to come. I don't shy away from the sinful condition of man's heart. I see it in my own toddler day in and day out. I see it in my selfishness for time to myself and the way I can snap back at the people I love the most. And yet, sin doesn't just exist in our family, but it is the state of our depraved world. Yet, where sin entered. The Savior came.